As we come up to this election year, I know there will be a lot of misinformation propagated by the extreme right wing that has taken over my Republican Party.
I thought that it would be important to identify this group early before things get into a good start so I put together this litmus test.
THE LITMUS TEST FOR BEING A TRUE REPUBLICAN, EXTREME RIGHT WING CONSERVATIVE, LOW INFORMATION VOTER.
1. Wisconsin’s Governor was right to dismantle the public servant unions because:
A. Unions are what ruined this country in the first place.
B. Everybody wants to be the messiah.
C. Teachers are fun to hate because I preformed so poorly in school myself.
D. All of the above.
2. The average annual salary of a teacher in Wisconsinis $50, 530 while the average salary of a plumber is $60, 110. Which is more important?
A. The guidance of children.
B. The guidance of shit through a piece of pipe.
3. If a real public school was featured in a theme park, what would the rides be?
A. The Hallway of Invisible Metal Detection and Twister of Teenage Pregnancy.
B. The “Chamber of Apathy” and the “Avoidance of Challenges” with “Premature Disillusionment.”
C. There would be no rides because the Tea Party aspects of the Republican Party would have sold them off to pay for a shortfall in the budget and would refuse to raise the taxes to keep it open and operating.
Realizing that education is even more important than ever in this completive global market, why do Teabaggers and the Ultra-Conservative Right Wing Republicans suddenly want school teachers to loose their collective negotiating voice and become poorer?
A. Because they are more important than ever.
B. Screw the teachers man.
C. I don’t want this good thing with Wal-Mart and China to end.
D. I am not educated enough to answer this question.
1. If you answered with any of these you are a Low Information Voter but even more so if you answered D. Answer A – C = 25 points. Answer D = 35 points. If you chose not to answer at all award yourself 0 points.
2. If you answered with “A,” award yourself with 0 points. If you chose “B,” award yourself 35 points.
3. Again, if you answered with “A” or “B,” you are a Low Information Voter so award yourself with 35 points. If you chose “C” award yourself with -5 because you have a good understanding of what the Tea Party and Ultra-Conservative Right Wing Republicans are really about. If you did not chose any answer award yourself 0 points.
Bonus Point Question:
If you answered “A” award yourself with 0 points because this question and answer are an oxymoron. If you answered B – C award yourself 35 points. It you answered “D” award yourself 50 points. If you chose not to answer as you saw no answer was correct to any normal and sane person, award yourself with -5 points.
Results of your total.
If you scored between -15 and 0, you cannot be a LIV Tea Party Ultra-Conservative Right Wing Republican and Rush Limbaugh will tell you how stupid and wrong you are…..this would be a complement by any sane and normal people’s standards.
If you scored between 1 – 70, you have a chance of being educated and turned around on your mislead and incorrect thinking.
If you scored between 71 – 155 you are a true and legal LIV and that lobotomy has had no ill affects on your state of mind. YOU ARE THE PREFECT CANDIDATE FOR BECOMING A TEABAGGER OR ULTRA-CONSERVATIVE RIGHT WING REPUBLICAN. I have set this test up so that the more ill informed your are, the higher score you would receive.
This in return will make you feel better about yourself as I am sure you do not get high marks as a general rule on any test given you because your Utopian Principles do not exist in the real world.
This being said of course your rights to breed and pass on your DNA has been revoked by “The Controllers.”
Lookup “Epsilons” from the book “Brave New World.”